Lessons Learned: The Booty Call

After recent discussion and confusion about this term and its supposedly implied etiquette, BitchNichole has consulted several sources to help her readers find an appropriate definition for the do's and don't of the bootycall. These are the top picks:

"Booty call verb or noun (1990s): A phone call, page, text message, instant message, or e-mail undertaken by one party to encourage the other to engage in casual sex, often occurring late at night. While either gender can instigate a booty call, it is most often engaged in by males under the influence of alcohol. In the noun form, the booty call is the one who recieves the call and accepts the booty caller's invitation for a sexual liason."

-Ian Kerner, PhD Be Honest You're Not That Into Him Either

The diva clearly has issues with this definition for two main reasons. The first of which is because it implies that intercourse will take place and since she is an innocent little lady who assumes that all anyone ever does is kiss and hug it makes her slightly uncomfortable to imagine anyone would want anything else from her. Second, since she is a die hard feminist, she believes that women are just as likely to booty call as men.

"Booty call verb: Any phone call that takes place after 10 pm."

-PapaPhilley

This one isn't going to work for her either. Mostly due to the fact that, outside of her Sunday phone list of friends and family, the majority of the diva's phone calls take place after 10, none of which she would define as booty calls."

"Booty call verb: Any phone call that takes place after midnight CST."

-Rooms

Yeah still not going to work for BitchNichole. There's a slight chance that she could still be trying to catch up with friends.

"Booty call verb: Phone calls, text messages, etc. That take place after 1 am that include such phrases as "Wanna make out?" or "Can I come over?" It is still no guarentee for anything other than interesting conversation and at least 10 minutes of mediocre kissing. Often occurring between friends with benefits."

-BitchNichole

Clearly this is her favorite definition because she created it herself.

THE DO'S AND DON'T OF BOOTY CALLING

1. The asker will not dance around the subject. The booty call itself should consist of one short and sweet little question.

2. The asked should give a simple yes or no answer to the question.

3. The asker cannot get offended by or question the reasoning for a negative answer, nor should the asked feel obligated to explain her/his reasoning for the decline.

4. Nothing at all is implied by a positive answer. Go into the booty call with absolutely no expectations whatsoever.

5. Men show some respect. The diva has seen one too many ladies pulling off the walk of shame in the morning. If she doesn't have a ride home in the morning provide one. Honestly everyone pities these girls. Especially freshman.

6. Ladies demand some respect. It's gotta be embarrassing taking that walk. Make arrangements to get a ride home, really!